Procrastination 101

It is official...I am 2 wks away from moving to Jacksonville and have nothing packed...I've gotta get on the ball!!

Let Go

Please keep my mom in your prayers. I spoke with her on Monday [and found out more details yesterday] and she told me that her liver and kidneys are failing her. She says that dialysis is the next step for her and she has been going to the doctor every other week for a check up. They say that they can't do anything for her. She has known that they were failing for about a year now and was told 4 months ago that she was estimated only 18 more months for her. I believe that God has the power to determine that and not the doctors. She wasn't going to tell me, or anyone else for that matter, but she did and I have shared it with my sisters. We are all trying to take it in as much as we can right now.

I also ask that you pray for me. Many of you have probably not heard my testimony, but without going into a whole lot of detail I will say that I have a lot of bitterness and anger built in my heart towards my mother. There are things that she has done that have affected me so strongly that I guess she didn't realize until it was too late. [If you want to know more, I will be glad to share my testimony with you]

As I am sitting here restless, yet another night, my mind won't stop. It keeps on going as if a million possibilities could be going through it right now, but only one is passing slow enough for me to dwell on. What if she is taken and I never made things right? What if I don't have/take that chance to set things straight with her? But then another question arises...How do I set it right if she was the one in the wrong. She was the one who left me, so what am I supposed to do.

Well, my first thought is to be blunt with her and let my stubbornness sink in as I wait for her to apologize for the wrong that was done to me, but I know that isn't what I am supposed to do. I know that I have to forgive her and let it go. It happened in the past and if I dwell on what happened then, I can't focus on what God is doing now, in the present. I know that He has BIG plans that I can't even begin to imagine, but He can't work those plans out if I won't let the past things go.

Someone pointed out to me tonight that my relationships in the future are all affected by my relationship with my mother and I totally agree. I am so afraid to get too close to anyone now because I am so afraid that I will let my guard down and I will be left and hurt all over again. And the walls refuse to come down. I know that God can break them down. He can crush the walls of hurt and bitterness inside that are holding me back from what He has for me. Barlow Girl has a song out that has really spoken to me today and I wanted to share it with you guys. It is called Let Go...

Yeah I trust in You
I remember times You led me
This time it's bigger now
And I'm afraid You'll let me down

But how can I be certain?
Will You prove Yourself again?

'Cause I'm about to let go
And live what I believe
I can't do a thing now
But trust that You'll catch me
When I let go
When I let go

What is this doubt in me
Convincing me to fear the unknown
When all along You've shown
Your plans are better than my own

And I know I won't make it
If I do this all alone

'Cause I'm about to let go
And live what I believe
I can't do a thing now
But trust that You'll catch me
When I let go
When I let go


Anyway, I just wanted to leave that with you for tonight. I will keep you all posted on my mom and myself as well. I love you guys and thanks for all your prayers.

Chels

Ministry

Let me just start off by saying that so much has been on my mind lately. I finished school last week [whoo hoo!], have just been working now, got my puppy last week [pic soon], getting ready for the move to Jacksonville, and some ministry changes as well.

Here lately, God has really placed on my heart to get more involved with our children's ministry at church. It is on my heart to lead Children's worship. This includes leading in songs and a lesson every Sunday morning with the middle aged kids group. I have helped in there before and really enjoyed it. I talked to Angie, children's ministry director, today and am meeting with her on Sunday to talk a little more about it. She says she has a lot of ideas for the ministry and wanted me to be involved, but didn't want to pressure me to move from the student ministry. But this is where He is leading me. I ask for your prayers and I trust Him in this.

China

My trip for China will be the whole month of July again. We will head off to Chatsworth, GA for a couple days of training and getting to know each other and then, we will fly out of Atlanta a few days later. We will be back on August 1st.

While there our teams will run English camps teaching the kids English through song, drama, conversation, and games. The trip is $2500. Airfare is $1500 due 4/22 and the remainder is due by 5/15. So far, I have raised $790. If you would like to give towards this mission, you can send to

Munford Baptist Church
c/o Jim Usher
P.O. Box 129
Munford, AL 36268

Make checks payable to Munford Baptist Church with Chelsea's China Mission Trip in the 'FOR' line. Any donation would be much appreciated. I will continue to update on the progress.

This week

This has been quite the week. My sister has moved in with us and I am adjusting. I haven't lived with her since we were younger. Although the circumstances for this is difficult, I am praying that her and I will become much closer.

I have worked close to 45 hours this week at work [plus going to school]. We are trying to get the store ready for corporate to come in and evaluate our store. It is exhausting. They will be at our store on Thursday and will not even be there very long, but it should be interesting. Our district manager, Don, will also be at the store Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday getting us ready for them.

Finals are coming up in a couple of weeks and I am ready for school to be out. I am so ready for this summer to be here. I am ready for China to be back. I am having a slight problem though. Please pray that funds would be made available to pay for my trip. I believe that God will provide for it. It is just hard to see right now.

Whoo hoo!!

I am moving to Jacksonville!

I met with the manager at the Grove today and I signed my lease. Everything is now taken care of. The scholarship will pay for everything [except maybe my puppy, but it isn't going to be that bad to pay for her]. They are supposed to call me when they find out if the association will pay for my application fee or not.

I am so beyond excited...but people at church are beginning to warn me about that place. They say it is a bad party scene, but I am believing God will use me to make a difference on our campus.

The Grove

The Grove is the place I am considering moving to in Jacksonville. It is amaazing! I went for a tour of the apartments and saw all of the Grove's featured amenities as well. I think I really want to move in there. It is so much closer to campus and will be so much more convenient. I am waiting to hear from the Horatio Alger Association to see if they will still pay for my living expenses [which would be suhweet!]. Please pray that this opportunity is still available to me. I will keep all two of you who read updated.

Out for now. :)
Chels

blog

new post to my thought blog...

The dress...

So, this is the last year that I can go to prom, so I might as well make the most of it right?? Lol. J/k. This is Joseph's last year and we are going to his Sr. prom...I know, I know...I never thought I would be one to go back to those high school days, but here I am and anyway, here is the dress [the picture does it no justice though].


Also, here is some fun pictures from our snow day. :)

Our snowman...[it looks like we got cropped into these pictures w the snowman]

Jessica's and my snowangels

...and what became of our snowman...

Sister

I just found out tonight that my Sister is joining the Air Force. Once enlisted, she will head off to Texas to stay on base for 4 months. This is going to be difficult for many of us as she is very important to us.

Daily Doses

I have started a new blog. I encourage you to check it out. So far, there is just the foreward on it, but tonight it will contain more.

The site is chelsdevo@blogspot.com

Chels

Are you ready for a revolution?

These past few weeks have been insane. I figure I would go ahead and update while I have a chance. For the few of you that actually read this, here goes...

All I have really had time for lately is just going to school and work and church. It has been difficult to factor anything else in, but God has still been so awesome. He is still continuing to speak so much into my life and showing me so many things all in the craziness of my everyday life. It just goes to show that God is not limited to anything that my feeble mind can come up with to be a hindrance. It may seem that no extra time is to be found, but I have realized that I have sweet opportunity to encounter God more closely than usual in my commute between school and work. I have also been able to encounter Him walking between classes. It is quite the stride between buildings, but it doesn't seem to be so terrible when I get to converse with my amazing Creator. His beauty is more majestic than I can comprehend. I praise my Father for allowing me these opportunities and can only hope that He will use me on the campus of JSU. He knows how much they need Him. I am ready to see the campus rocked and revolutionized. He can do it. I will continue to make myself available.

All for now.
Chels

hmm.

Joseph and I are embarking on a new journey together. :)

Brief Update

Work and school have been keeping me extremely busy. The job that I thought would be 30 hours a week has brought me to realize that it is usually going to be between 30 and 40. Tonight was my first night to close by myself...and of course something had to go wrong. My paperwork wouldn't print and I had no clue what to do when it wouldn't.

Also, Joseph and I have started hanging out again. We went on our second first date last night. It was great. It brought back so many memories. It was repeat of our first first date. And really sweet. :) We are going out with a couple from our church, good friends of ours, tomorrow night after church and after I get off work. I am excited.

Well, that's it for now. Sorry it's not much.
Chels

NEWS

I GOT THE JOB!! :) I started training tonight on how to close and learn how to open in the morning.

Oh yeah, and I started classes today at JSU.

New in 09

I am now officially a student at Jacksonville State University and start classes on Friday.

AND...

Last Sunday, I got offered the shoe manager position at Peebles. At first, our DM, Stan, had told Connie [my wonderful boss] that he wanted her to interview other people as well. I found out today that she interviewed others and they just didn't seem right and so...I have a interview with Stan on Thursday for the job. :)

School days...

As another year has come and gone so quickly, I have found that my heart has learned many lessons this year. I have managed to finish my first year of college only to have to begin college all over again a few months later. I have achieved going on my first major mission trip while also managing to go out of the country for the first time and also get on a plane for the first time.

A few lessons I have learned...

- God has to come before anything that I bring into my life. If He is not first, then not only one thing, but many others will begin to pile up before Him and in His place.

- Jesus is my heartbeat; missions is my passion. I truly enjoy serving others. It is what I was made for. Serving and helping other people gives me such joy.

- My greatest dream is to open an orphanage in a foreign country. I have taken my first step towards that and am working towards the second step.

- I should never be allowed in a kitchen by myself cooking...ever...things end up burnt.

- Me + empty house alone = one very paranoid 20 yr old.

- I enjoy spending time with my friends and family, but sometimes have to make myself refrain from being around people so that I can concentrate on alone time with my Father.

- I will probably never [or not for a long time anyway] ride a go kart again. I am not fond of them right now...or the drugs I have to take to be able to feel ok after having wrecked one...

Well, that's all of my lessons for now. I am sure there are many I forgot, but I am stopping there for now.

School starts on Thursday [and orientation in Tuesday]. I am super pumped, yet so nervous all at the same time. Jacksonville State is so much bigger than Southeastern, which really doesn't make me feel real great about it. But I am so ready to get into what God has waiting for me. Becoming a Social worker is my next step to achieving the Big Dream God has placed within me. I am so excited and cannot wait to see who I get to meet through this program at JSU and can't wait to see how He will use me to help so many.

Also, I am starting my fundraising for China. I get to go back this summer. :) The trip is a couple hundred dollars more than it was last year, but I know God will provide like He did last year.

Out for now.
Chels

Winter Xtreme 08

I went to Winter Xtreme this week with the students. It was an awesome time with some really great bands and speakers. Unfortunately, my body didn't have as much fun. Monday, I was sick. Tuesday, I felt great; yet that evening came to an end when I wrecked the go kart I was driving on a track. And Wednesday, I was reaping the benefits from the wreck. My body is still really sore, but I had xrays done and no bones were broken [praise the Lord]. He gave me some meds and sent me on my way. I am praying for quick recovery and hoping that I will be alright enough to go to work tomorrow.